Helping Children Come to Terms With Divorce

Children rarely welcome the idea that their parents are getting divorced. Still, there’s a lot you can do as a parent to make this change easier for your kids to handle. Whether you’re just preparing to tell your children that you’re ending your marriage or in the midst of a divorce right now, here’s what you should know about how the process impacts children and how you can help kids cope with divorce.

Why Divorce Is Hard on Kids

Children thrive on stability and close social bonds. They constantly have to adjust to their changing brains and bodies, so they do best when they receive external support from safe, consistent routines and regular interaction with adults they trust.

When parents divorce, it throws those routines and relationships into question. Divorces often include stressful things like:

  • Losing daily interaction with parents: Even if you and your spouse split custody evenly, your child won’t be able to spend time with both of you every day like they’re used to. If one of you receives sole custody, they may feel like they’re losing one parent entirely.
  • Moving homes and schools: Kids often find moves stressful even when their family isn’t changing, and it is often worse during a divorce. The new environment requires them to change their routines and expectations from the ground up.
  • Traveling between households with different rules: If you share custody, your children must get used to spending time at both homes. If each household has different rules, it can make adjusting even harder for your children. 

It’s no wonder many children struggle to cope with divorce when also facing these issues.

Tips for Helping Your Kids Cope With Divorce

Despite these changes, millions of children with divorced parents grow up happy in the U.S. every year. The following tips can help you support your kids as they adjust to your divorce:

  • Communicate with your co-parent. As long as you’re raising children together, you should talk to your ex-spouse to ensure you’re on the same page.
  • Be consistent. Keep routines and rules the same before and after your split and between households. Consistency allows your kids to process their emotions faster without trying to keep up with other changes.
  • Talk to your kids. They probably have big emotions about your divorce. Talk to them about how they feel and remind them that no matter what happens, you and your spouse will always love, protect, and support them. This helps them feel more secure in their place in the family, even as its structure changes.

Make Your Divorce Easier for Everyone With Viola Law Firm, P.C.

A fast and efficient divorce can help your kids adjust to their new lives in less time. The skilled family law attorneys at the Viola Law Firm, P.C., can help you accomplish that. Learn how our San Mateo divorce law firm can help you streamline your divorce and make the process less stressful by calling us or reaching out online today.

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Have more questions about divorce? Check out our Divorce Q&A.